Other Projects

Catboi Kropotkin is always trying to physically put himself into my writing, so here he is.

A WOMAN A DAY TIL BIKINI KILL IN L.A.: a countdown blog about women who have been revolutionary to musical culture leading up to a Bikini Kill reunion show in L.A. with a surprising twist at the end, which is now being expanded and edited into a book which will be named something else entirely and feature the gorgeous illustrations of Jessica Seamans and glorious portrait quilts of Rosy Petri. (Send me an email sometime reminding me to finish the proposal and I will send you something nice to thank you.)

FUTURE MUSIC FUCK SAUCE: a zine I am in the process of creating about music that knocked up the future, inspired by a tweet another music journalist made about the need to eliminate “seminal” from the linguistic canon. Despite being an English teacher, I had never noticed the root of the word or thought for a moment about it. I do think coming all over the future is what important artists do, though. I also think it is beautiful, that anyone can do it, and that all of us should try. For these reasons, we should stop using the word “seminal,” but immediately replace it with its gender neutral and much more modern alternative: future music fuck sauce. It all began with the following sentence: “Patti Smith says she doesn’t fuck much with the past, but she fucks plenty with the future, and Patti Smith came all over the future.” I have all the ideas written out and I bought a long-arm stapler, I just need to actually sit down and put it all together. This is also the first phase of the war I have declared on the Chicago Reader, and I suppose I will do it soon, while they have no ad revenue and extremely limited distribution, as it is a perfect time for a self-published takeover.

ALL OF MY PROJECTS ARE PROJECTS OF FUCK SAUCE MEDIA

I DO NOT SEND A PITCH

I DO NOT WASTE MY TIME

I DO NOT WRITE THE STORY YOU WANT, THE ONE THAT SUITS YOUR INTENDED THEME, OR THE ONE THAT FULFILLS YOUR EXTREMELY SMALL COMMITMENT TO CENTERING MARGINALIZED VOICES BEFORE RETURNING THEM TO THE MARGIN OR NOT EVEN CREDITING THEM IN THE INDEX; I WRITE THE ONE THE WORLD NEEDS

I GATHER ALL OF THE TELEPHONE BOOKS SLUMPED BY THE DOOR OF MY APARTMENT BUILDING ON TOP OF THE AD-BASED BILLIONAIRE-OWNED NEWSPAPER DISTRIBUTION BOX AND RELINQUISH THEM ALL TO THE DUSTBIN OF HISTORY

MUSIC WRITING DOES NOT PAY ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH EDITORIAL BULLSHIT

© FUCK SAUCE MEDIA 2020